within
homunculus, within
we have spent a long time
without talking. quiet
through cold mornings
wrapped in night’s sin,
the ebbing of the stars
and lips that complicate it
all.
so much time spent
tracing the dust
on the window glass,
or the waters lapping
at ears, at arms. these aren’t
either of our ears
these arms, taking
strength are neither.
the kiss of the moon -
the clasp of the sun
touch of another
day becomes twilight
twilight becomes early morning
the distance between
ear to ear,
brains
lost
5:03am
I can get out of bed
At 5:03am.
I could go to work
I could buy a coffee
(soy, with no sugar)
and sip it till I’m awake.
Could make money,
For money’s own sake.
I could write that email
to my boss, and say hello
to a friend.
I could walk a road
till I found the dead end.
I could steal a thousand dollars
Run away somewhere
a thief and a lawyer,
that’d be some pair.
Like dad said
Could become a soldier
Could pretend I
could be a person
just to take an order.
I could be a painter,
waking up to trace
a thousand different faces
in a new and beautiful place.
I think I could figure out
how to buy and sell the stocks
could learn the value
of this or that fucking rock.
Plants are pretty,
so maybe a botanist
with Latin lining
another and another list,
poisons and potions
the ins and outs
of different smelling lotions.
I guess I could study
maybe be a doctor
maybe a diplomat
maybe a politician.
I could say fuck it all,
I’ll just be an astronaut
I could ride a rocket
to the edge of my thoughts.
And there
I could ride comets
free the stars
steal the moon
rule the waves
travel round the world
and break it in two
one piece to me,
one piece to you.
But, I don’t think I will.
Never one to kill
Never one to broker
Never saw a plant
I’d like to fuss over;
Not really a painter,
Could never make anyone
Less fainter.
Couldn’t get the hang
Of any pretty thing
Never was one for riding
Or stealing, or hiding
bits of this or that
Or taking worlds
and growing fat.
Could never give someone
everything,
never really wanted to
Not that much of a fool.
Sure, it might seem cool
But I’m in bed now,
so let me sleep.
So, I think, at 5:03am
I’ll stay where I am,
Roll over and hug you,
And go back to sleep.